whatever

the following is what i did with my day. think he's kidding? WRONG.

Travis: what time are you coming?
9 ?
10?
Sent at 4:04 PM on Tuesday
me: no earlier than that
i get off of work at 5 and then i'm meeting dana to work out
and then when we're done working out we'll go run to the store to buy what we're bringing
Travis: 11?
me: so we might get there by 7:30
Travis: jesus stephanie
me: what?
Travis: what are we going to do with out the chips and dips?
me: i'm sorry!
i forgot to buy them yesterday
Travis: no one will have fun at 'party' with out the chips and dips
me: that's not true. but no one will have fun without me there.
Travis: that's not true.
everyone needs the chips and dips
me: i'm sorry, but this is the first day of dana's and my workout schedule and i am not going to skip it.
i have to start off right
there's a good chance i won't even be late, so DONT FREAK OUT
Travis: this is the first day of the new world stephanie and we can't start it with out chips and dips
IM FREAKIN OUUUUT
me: it already started at 11am our time and we haven't had chips n dip this whole afternoon!
Travis: EXACTLY
thats why we need them post haste!
me: new status. check it.
Travis: maybe you should just bring the chips and dips before you go tot he gym and then just don't come to the party
OH and
I no longer have a plan B for you
sorry
me: hahahaha. i JUST now got the plan B joke.
i didn't get it earlier.
Travis's new status message - no longer will provide plan B to yeargen... 4:12 PM
me: spell my name right!
yeargAn
Travis's new status message - yergen? yeargon? jerkgan? who cares!?! 4:13 PM
Stephanie's new status message- is going to spill queso all over travis's house.
Travis: NO YOU WONT because you WONT bring the chips and dips
so help me moses I will coat you in cheese
me: i won't bring any chips. just a gallon jug of queso.
Sent at 4:14 PM on Tuesday
Travis: well it wont matter because there is nto going ot be a party any more
its off
me: you're lying just so i won't come!
Travis: NO
i had to cancel it
because its not a party without CHIPS AND DIPS
Stephanie's new status message- is going to camp out on travis's front lawn until he invites her to his party.
Sent at 4:16 PM on Tuesday
Travis's new status message - is greatful for the woman eating bears he purchased the other day to protect his house from campers. 4:17 PM
Travis's new status message - doesn't pay for party poopers. 4:18 PM
Stephanie's new status message- is thankful she lives in texas where she can purchase a rifle. or two.
Travis's new status message - is thankful he lives in texas where we can shoot women for not providing the chips and dips. 4:20 PM
Stephanie's new status message- is thankful she lives in texas where people are sentenced to DEATH.
Travis's new status message - is thankful in texas in texas women are still seen as property and can be sold on the black market 4:24 PM
Travis's new status message - jsut wants chips and dips and he wants it on time 4:25 PM
me: are you really upset about this? i'm sorry if it's going to cause a problem...
Travis: IM FURIOUS!
i just feel like
if you say you're bringing the chips and dips then you should bring them on time
everyone knows that a good party needs chips and dips
what are people supposed to do while the hotdogs cook?
look at eachother?
talk to one anyother?
NO YEARGAN
they EAT
the chips and dips
.
me: i'm not coming anymore. you can find your own CHIPS AND DIPS
Travis: GOOD becaus ei already told you
the party is off
Im not having a party with out chips and dips
and
well
looks like you're the pooper
me: that's right blame me. i am the reason the new world sucks
Travis: YOU ARE
and you stupid chips and dips
you haven't heard it yet
but Obama actually said that you were disappointing in his address
he said he was expecting a great party but there is no party without chips and dips
and its because people have given up
they've given up on the things in life that used to be firm
and real
and expected
like chips and dips at a party
they
ve
given up on the notion that for one to enjoy ones self
they need some chips
and some dips
and they need them before the hot dogs are finished
because with out them
what is the nation supposed to do?
stand around with their thumbs up their butts?
now i know you think that sounds fun
and i wont lie and say i don't either
but its not RIGHT
its not what you dooo at a party
at a party you stand
and you eat the chips and dips while someone fixes the hot dogs
not thumbs steph,
not absense
not anything but the social responsibility to provide
to provide the thing that every sees as a staple to what right and acceptable and
right.
the bottom line is
that im right
and you're not
and if you don't bring the chips and dips then there is nothing right in this world anymore
we can throw away all those ideals we hold so dear
like being right
and doing what i say
and world peace and shit
because with out you bring me MY GOD GIVEN RIGHT to chips and dips at a party theres nothing left for me to do but give the feck up.
I give up
im done with it all
me: GOOD. move to canada.
but i doubt they will even have chips and dips there.
Travis: thats the problem
and thats why i've decided to send you there
me: good. i'm gonna become BFFs with feist and kevin drew
Travis: because thats the problem and you're a problem and you should go there
me: and alanis morissette
Travis: doubtful
once they told me they were only friends with people because they ALWAYS brought around chips and dips
and i'll tell them that you didn't
and don't
me: as if YOU are friends with them.
Travis: and that you're a huge biatch
AS IF IM NOT!
anyway
im going to go
see you 7:30 with chips and dips
me: yeah you do that. go. go cry some more
Travis: oh i might be crying
but not as hard as you will be when i kick you in the cooch later
me: you won't be seeing me. i'll be hanging out with ryan gosling and crystal castles and emily haines in toronto.
Travis: listen steph
whatever
its whatever
Sent at 4:40 PM on Tuesday